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Being Bottom - Do you face Prejudices?


Submitted by kinkbud Location: All India (All India, India)

Is it difficult being a bottom psychologically? i mean in a conservative society like India and where being a member of LGBT community is seen with hatred . have you ever came across a person who treated you just to fulfill their desires and have looked down upon you for being a bottom..lets share our thoughts

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Displaying 51 to 70 of 70 comments.
Previous comments: 1  2  

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CrazyCruiser
Posted On Sep 19, 2018

Gawd, this is such a self-deprecating discussion. I mean, instead of sharing your bad experiences, you can just be assertive. It doesn't even take any physical strength to be so. It looks you guys require a gay-version of the feminism movement where "bots" are given equal rights (such as equal blowjob time, ensuring that the top makes you ***, cuddles after ***)! Are bottoms women that people can easily deny them a whole bunch of things even if they try to ask for them? Just the way charity begins at home, victimisation begins at home too. Stop seeing yourself as a victim and people will treat you as the way you want them to. You're not stuck in a forced arranged marriage that you have to keep on sobbing like this as if it's your destiny.

In fact this whole "bottom" categorisation is done by the regressive guys (straight and/or gay) just because theirs is an insertive role, which can be compared with that of women in a heteronormative relation. And this shitty thinking is pretty much prevalent in third world countries like India, because of the status of women here. Submissive doesn't mean lesser self-respect. It's a sexual preference, not a real life behaviour and attitude. And it is YOU bottoms who need to impress that upon your man. Stop *** being a sissy and go on PMSing in a forum.

(I'm ranting like this as if I'm a macho top. I'm not. I'm flexible versatile, with right kind of thinking.)

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Gulfisaforever
Posted On Sep 19, 2018

I m not sure if you guys are on the same page. We were, or at least I was talking abt the supercilious attitude of ppl who are tops n think they are above versatiles or bottons. Nothing to do with what goes on in bed during an intercourse. It extends to other areas. Anyways, enough said.

Crazycruiser, u seem to have this personality trait of exploding into a rant out of the blue, nd spit venom towards others needlessly. Be careful abt wht u say. Even grindr is introducing the concept of 'kindr'. Be considerate of what u say. Rather than just playing the blame game etc.

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dirtypig788
Posted On Oct 20, 2018

this definitely most debatable topic in gay ***...i can clearly say..mostly straight guys who could not find a girl need some one for ***.. its based on my experience...Sometimes even i never had atleast warm hug,.. then no talk after ***...

i would say even before you have ***...just try to find whether he is straight/bi/curious/gay... then you can atleast don't get disappointed even if he didnt touch you as your mind is already set..

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dirtypig788
Posted On Nov 15, 2018

This was my curious question I want to ask...in *** .. why top cannot kiss bottom.. what he is trying to prove here.. he is very well aware that he going have *** with guy.. but it’s to bad to use another guy as object..

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bisxxdman
Posted On Nov 15, 2018

@dirtypig - a real gay top or even a real bi-top would always kiss,hug,bite,lick a bottom as a male does to a female.
But not all here are real. Many men here masquerading as pure tops just want their *** *** or *** a ***. They don't do anything to please a bottom because they are not gays/bis but straight men many into sexless marriage wanting a relief but doesn't have either guts to patao another female or means ( money,place,etc) to have a affair or both.
These are selfish pathetic men best avoided.

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dirtypig788
Posted On Nov 15, 2018

@bisxxdman , Pure Tops .. I hate that word.. I have watched lot of videos from foreign countries .. even though that guys is Straight . want to have *** with Men .. First thing they do is kiss.. Thats the respect you are giving to other guys

But only in Indian gay world we are not eligible to get a kiss also . :(

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Valentine84
Posted On Nov 15, 2018

@dirtypig - hope you would have read my comment about tops in this same thread. There nothing as 'pure tops' in Indian context. Cos the guys who claim themselves as pure tops are merely desperate straights. These self proclaimed " pure tops" are not man enough to find a girl to *** and so they exploit a gay guy and try to use them as a bottom. They don't kiss. They don't *** but they expect the bottom as their *** object alone. To your question on " WHAT ARE THEY TRYING TO PROVE HERE"?

Well the answer is simple. These self proclaimed "pure tops" are merely cowardice who can't tackle their own self ego and so they act this way just to Virtually satisfy their otherwise inferiority complex levels.

TOPS - A top is one who GIVES pleasure to a bottom. If he merely TAKES pleasure using a bottom he is not a top.


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Lips4hugepoles
Posted On Nov 15, 2018

Being a bottom, i hardly ever faced any prejudice. But probably because I'm still in the closet so i don't know.
But my partners are usually pretty nice with me.

About the whole kissing thing : i prefer being kissed by my top. But it's ok if he doesn't like kissing. I've dated guys who don't kiss me but i still get good pleasure during ***. Hell, in fact when i started off as a bottom, got the first several years I was so oblivious, i didn't allow any tops to smooch me, until one guy finally insisted and i allowed. After that i couldn't stop. But I guess it's more of a personal choice. No big deal

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wingedcupid
Posted On Nov 16, 2018

What an irony this world has...few of my lamentations..

1. A straight guy is ready to *** a girl even if she resembles a hippopotamus but will never agree to give *** to a cute gay man

2. So many movie songs praise female body and objectifies but they hardly adore mens beauty

3. At work you toil hard yet get no attention but so many men in project wants to talk to some good looking girl

4. You watch in *** indian women lying like a dead wood whereas hungry men sweat and crave over her body

4. My personal exp.. Once a cute guy came and sat opposite to me in a train. He was damn hot. I was listening to some songs and didnt focus on him. He was not able to sit quietly and kept asking me something. I was going to cloud nine whenever he struck a conversation but to my dismay the gimmicks are all for 2 girls who were sitting besides me! Damn damn!!!

Why is the whole world appearing to me running behind triangles? Dont we deserve some attention

It is because that the society is blind/ignorant towards male attention, this gets etched on tops mind that *** is only with girls. With this mentality, guys they just wanna spread their legs, make us ***. No boobs press or hug or kiss. Its ok to go to an extent of drinking anything coming of woman for them ;) ( excuse my vulgarity)

Ps: i avoid such deadwoods. Thanks to xdressing i get men who adores me within 4 walls at least..sigh


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versbang
Posted On Nov 16, 2018

Really? I'm a versatile top. How can a person directly *** or ask u to *** without a kiss hug or body play? How will he get into mood?

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Apb
Posted On Nov 16, 2018

It's just a narrow minded tops ,with selfish mind,and some with lack of knowledge too act like this ,, but with out love and care to each other, without total involvement, of mind N body , no *** / action is COMPLETE ..

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wingedcupid
Posted On Nov 16, 2018

@versbang why not? I can have *** with women like that. Not attracted to their bodies mentally but still can poke mine into them, hump till they get climax . Perhaps same way for the st8 guys..so ur comment made me feel that u should not complain about this :)
Also such st8 guys meet mostly at desperate times which actually doesnt require desperate measure to keep their *** stand!

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hotbotpop
Posted On Jul 19, 2021

I've never been desperate for ***. I look reasonably manly and do boys stuff lol. But as a bottom, I love it if tops are dominating and take charge in bed. Especially if they are masculine with big ***. But I don't like to be treated without respect out of bed. If anyone dare to do that, I'll leave them right away giving a piece of my mind. Thankfully none of the tops have ever been disrespectful to me so far other than during *** as I specifically ask them to verbally abuse/dominate while at ***. And usually I'm the first to ***, so many a times I leave the tops high and dry half way. I would be laughing on the way back thinking of that, evil fun :D

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ToBeFreeinLyf
Posted On Jul 19, 2021

The short answer would be 'yes'. Being a feminine bottom, I've always been treated as someone soft and weak, someone who can be dominated easily and overuled. And so when I say no to someone, the usual response is abuse, some go to the point of harassing through fake accounts after you block them. Most, yes most tops are of the opinion that a bottom cannot reject them, why? Because they have a ***. It's as if nobody else does and that gives them privileges. So yes, bottoms do face prejudice.

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Dombot26
Posted On Mar 11, 2022

Yes yes and yes . The word bottom for many is just a guy with a hole ready to take anyone's ***, that's the majority of the mentality out there in the society and that's shocking and disgusting.They think bottoms or sometimes vers shouldn't be given a option to choose his partner.
Being a dominant guy , I experience this sort of prejudice and harassment from many guys here, the words they use and their mentality are just so repulsive and nauseous.
I had to delete my last profile becoz of some *** like that .And there are other bottoms out there preaching "we are born to satisfy tops" or "bottoms have no rights" guys you are bottoms yes but a submissive slave is your tittle so don't include every other bottom out there to your so called slaves to *** group .
Bottoms or vers both are humans and have feelings and are free to choose their partners.if anyone says otherwise or abuses you then just ignore them.

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Dombot26
Posted On Mar 11, 2022

But I also have to mention that in my experience so far I have met so many genuine guys who are understanding and caring and kind to their partners.
Not all tops have the same mentality , there are genuine gentlemens out there .Who listen to you , who speak their mind ,who aren't afraid to explore their fetishes.

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hotbotpop
Posted On Mar 11, 2022

I'm a bottom but not the girly type. Other guys in work and outside respect me a lot and they assume I'm straight.

When cruising, the tops are usually respectful. Once in a while, I've faced rough tops who don't care a damn and I sort of like that during ***. But not always (complex needs I know :P)


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Bins
Posted On Mar 14, 2022

Genuine tops often respect bottoms as a partner. I am a bottom, and except one guy, I've had good experiences with the others. I am not girly and not ready to cross dress either.
I do love a little bit of roughness and love to be spanked while being *** and all that. Except the desperate hole seekers, who behave to be an entitled lot because of their possession, the others have been largely good

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Rohitdadaq
Posted On Mar 14, 2022

I am vers....

With bottoms I *** .ND make sure they get an orgasm

With tops...I *** if I'm getting *** .I eat *** if I'm getting eaten πŸ˜‹


Foreplay has got nothing to do with being top or bot ...I have had tops who like foreplay ND cuddling after *** as well

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slaveforyou
Posted On Mar 16, 2022

I agree with @rohitdadaq. It's all about pleasure and self satisfaction. Be explorer and explore your body πŸ˜‰

Being versatile I too come accross many tops who are just intrested in screwing and the only thing they need is *** to rub their genital. Avoid meeting such kind of guys who are self centred and just focus on their pleasure. These dnt care about the bottom or other person. Try and wait till the guy with whom you vibe and understand you irrespective of role or position you play.

Previous comments: 1  2